Sarcastic Quotes On Love
Love doesn’t pay rent at least it never has for me. One of the easiest thing to be sarcastic about love is just so utterly mock able. There are moments when you just have to say things in a sarcastic way to emphasize your point or to not hurt ignorant people when you are just so annoyed and want to speak your mind. So, this Sarcastic Quotes on love will make you laugh. Enjoy Reading!!
Sarcastic Quotes on Love and Relationship
- “Love is like war, easy to begin but hard to end.”
- “Before you find your handsome prince, you’ve got to kiss a lot of frogs.”
- “Loving a man is like flying a kite. You only need to know when to wind up the string or let it out.”
- “There’s plenty of fish in the sea, I’m just no good at fishing.”
- “You can’t buy love, but you can pay heavily for it.”
- “Every man I meet wants to protect me. I can’t figure out what from.”
- “All I really need is love, but a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.”
- “My girlfriend told me that she was seeing another man. I told her to rub her eyes.”
- “I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.”
- “Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much. You’re not that good.”
- I love you for all that you are all that you have been and all you’re yet to be.”
- “Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says, “Oh crap, she’s up!”
- “It’s not your job to like me…it’s mine.”
- “Accept that some days you are the pigeon, and some days you are the statue.”
- “Even people who are good for nothing can bring smile on your face, when pushed down the stairs.”
- “I’m sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I really thought you already knew.”
- “I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow doesn’t look good either.”
- “May be you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.”
- “I have reached that age where my brain goes from you probably shouldn’t say that to what the hell, let’s see what happens.”
Wise Sarcastic Quotes
- “Mistakes are a part of being human. Appreciate your mistakes for what they are precious life lessons that can only be learned the hard way.”
- “Your problem is you’re … too busy holding onto your unworthiness.”
- “I’m not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I’m going to Hell?”
- “I am sorry, I didn’t realize that you are and expert on my life and how I should live it. Please continue while I take notes.”
- “I don’t hate you I’m just not necessarily excited about your existence.”
- “If you’re searching for that one person that will change your life, take a look in the mirror.”
- “Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.”
- “The fact that jellyfish have survived for 650 million years despite not having brain is great news for you.”
- “Can I help you? No I just waited in the line for 30 minutes to say Hi.”
- I have an everyday religion that works for me. Love yourself first, and everything else falls into line.”
- “Sometimes the only way you can feel good about yourself is by making someone else look bad. And I’m tired of making other people feel good about themselves!”
- “Not all girls are made of sugar and spice and everything nice. Some girls are made of sarcasm, wine and everything fine.”
- “You smell like drama and a headache, please get away from me.”
- “I am suggesting that as we go through life, we ‘accentuate the positive.’ I am asking that we look a little deeper for the good, that we still our voices of insult and sarcasm, that we more generously compliment and endorse virtue and effort.”
- “In my opinion, I think sarcasm and humor in a song, without turning it into a novelty song, is really charming.”
Sarcastic Quotes About Love and Life
- “I wish boys and girls could sleep over without it being a big deal.”
- “Do you remember the time when we fell in love?”
- “I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and don’t want to see your ugly mug every day.”
- “When people ask me stupid questions, it is my legal obligation to give a sarcastic remark.”
- “I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.”
- “If you love ’em in the morning with their eyes full of crust; If you love ’em at night with their hair full of rollers, chances are, you’re in love.”
- “I don’t think you’re an idiot at all. I mean, there are elements of the ridiculous about you. Your mother’s pretty interesting. And you really are an appallingly bad public speaker. And, um, you tend to let whatever’s in your head come out of your mouth without much consideration of the consequences… But the thing is, um, what I’m trying to say, very inarticulately, is that, um, in fact, perhaps despite appearances, I like you, very much. Just as you are.”
- “We have a couple of rules in our relationship. The first rule is that I make her feel like she’s getting everything. The second rule is that I actually do let her have her way in everything. And, so far, it’s working.”
- “To the people who lose one shoe on the side of the highway: Please tell me what the rest of your life is like.”
- “I’m technically single but my heart is taken by someone I can’t call my own.”
- “Don’t tell me to smile.”
- “If you treat me like an option, I’ll leave you like a choice.”
- “You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That is your common sense leaving your body.”
- “I solemnly swear I am up to no good. Especially when I am all alone with you!”
- “Sarcasm is weird. Even not in acting, in life I feel like ‘sarcastic’ is a word that people use to describe me sometimes so when I meet someone, it’s almost like they feel like they have to also be sarcastic, but it can sometimes just come off as mean if it’s not used in the right way.”
- “My feelings woke me up in the middle of the night.”
- “I think my neighbor is stalking me as she’s been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.”
- “My wife dresses to kill, she cooks the same way.”
Sarcastic Quotes About Love
- “I am a very committed wife. And I should be committed, too for being married so many times.”
- “I don’t understand your specific kind of crazy but I do admire your total commitment to it..”
- “You laugh because you think it is a joke. I laugh because you think I am joking.”
- “I love you with all my belly. I would say heart, but my belly is bigger.”
- “I probably carry a fair amount of sarcasm in my daily life.”
- “What I don’t understand is how a person can tell you so many lies and never feel bad about it.”
- “If you see me smiling it’s because I’m thinking of doing something evil or naughty. If you see me laughing it’s because I’ve already done it”
- “We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.”
- “I love that you get cold when it’s 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you’re looking at me like I’m nuts. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it’s not because I’m lonely, and it’s not because it’s New Year’s Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.”
- “No regrets in life. Just lessons learned.”
- “I am not responsible for what my face does when you talk.”
- “You love flowers, but you cut them. You love animals, but you eat them. You tell me you love me, so now I’m scared!”
- “Not many people can listen to you and survive. I should be getting an award.”
- “A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.”
- “I’m allergic to stupidity. I break out in sarcasm.”
- “Life is too short, smile while you still have teeth.”
- “Love makes people do silly things. Like, it made me send you this message!”
- “Trying to understand some people’s actions is like trying to smell the color 9.”
- “I love everyone, Some I love to be around, some I love to avoid, and other’s I would love to punch in the face.”
Sarcastic Quotes on Love for Status
- “I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.”
- “If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.”
- “Me pretending to listen should be enough for you.”
- “What did I do to give you the impression I actually care about what you think?”
- “If you text ‘I love you’ to a person and the person writes back an emoji — no matter what that emoji is, they don’t love you back.”
- “Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need 10 years before you can call yourself a beginner.”
- “I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.”
- “The more beautiful the woman is who loves you, the easier it is to leave her with no hard feelings.”
- “Keep rolling your eyes maybe you’ll find a brain back there.”
- “I always mean what I say I may not always mean to say it out loud, but I always mean it.”
- “I just want you that’s it. All your flaws, mistakes smiles, giggles, jokes sarcasm. Everything I just want you.”
- “No honey, you’re not the reason I breathe ever heard about oxygen?”
- “I find replying to an insult, easier than replying to a compliment.”
- “I don’t need a hero. I was blessed with a large amount of common sense, which is of infinitely more use than a man.”
- “When friends become over friendly – smell fish!”
- “I don’t do what I’m told, but I might do what you want if you ask me nicely.”
- “Ask me no questions, and I’ll tell you no fibs..”
- “Love at first sight is the most common eye disease.”
- “The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.”
Sarcastic Quotes About Life Lessons
- “If had a dollar for every smart thing you say. I’ll be poor.”
- “Love is a lot like a backache: it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there.”
- “Nobody really cares if you’re miserable, so you might as well be happy.”
- “Have you ever met human version of headache.”
- “Behind every angry woman stands a man who has absolutely no idea what he did wrong.”
- “I won’t cry for you, my mascara’s too expensive.”
- “The trouble with a kitten is that eventually it becomes a cat.”
- “You look good when your eyes are closed, but you look the best when my eyes closed.”
- “If you can stay in love for more than two years, you’re on something.”
- “Everyone has the right to be stupid, but you are abusing the privilege.”
- “I don’t have a dirty mind, I have a sexy imagination.”
- ” I think you are suffering from a lack of vitamin ME.”
Everyone might have enjoyed these Sarcastic Quotes on Love do share with your loved ones. Don’t forget that if you are sarcastic with someone you even may rebound the same.
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