Sarcastic Quotes On Relationship
Who does not like sarcasm? I am a sarcasm lover and therefore I have decided to deliver the best Sarcastic Quotes On Relationship for our readers. Things get more interesting when we get to read funny everywhere. So, spread the quotes with your loved ones and have a laughter time.
Funny Relationship Quotes For Instagram
- “I don’t sugar coat shit, I’m not Willy Wonka.”
- “I will never change myself to be easier for someone to deal with.”
- “Love may be important to the sustaining of life but let’s get real, money and oxygen are more important.”
- “Don’t like me? Cool, I don’t wake up every day to impress you.”
- “It’s a beautiful day to leave me alone.”
- “Some people will never like you because your spirit irritates their demons.”
- “Some people are like clouds. When they disappear it’s a beautiful day.”
- “There comes a point in your life when you realize who really matters, who never did, and who always will”
- “All you need is love. And an IQ low enough to believe that.”
- “I don’t exactly hate you but if you were on fire and I had water, I’d drink it”
- “If love’s the answer then you probably didn’t understand the question.”
- “A thousand words can’t bring you back. I know because I’ve tried and neither would a million tears I know because I’ve cried”
- “Marriage is a legal contract through which you can annoy that one special person for the rest of your life.”
- “The people that are quick to walk away are the ones who never intended to stay”
- “Everything happens for a reason. So if I punch you in the face, remember it was for a reason.”
- “Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet service to see who they really are.”
Hilarious Quotes Relationship
- “If you don’t love yourself then no one else is going to love you.”
- “My wife and I were happy for 20 years – then we met.”
- “Love is a two-way street constantly under construction.”
- “Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?”
- “Relationships don’t die a natural death. They’re murdered by attitude.”
- “Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.”
- “Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.”
- “I don’t need anyone to hold my hand. I can put my hands in my pockets and just keep walking”
- “The most important thing in a relationship between a man and a woman is that one of them must be good at taking orders.”
- “If you text I love you to a person and the person writes back an emoji, No matter what that emoji is, they don’t love you back.”
- “Don’t worry about hurting my feelings because I can guarantee there’s no link between my self-esteem and your acceptance of me.”
- “I’m no one’s backup option. Choose me or lose me. The choice is yours.”
- “I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.”
- “My EX had one very annoying habit. BREATHING.”
- “When someone says to expect the unexpected” slap them and say you didn’t expect that, did you?”
Sarcastic Relationship Captions
- “Yes, of course, you were my cup of tea but now I’m drinking champagne.”
- “I consider myself an expert on the unsuccessful relationship”
- “You were looking good by afar… Now you’re far from looking good”
- “I’m not insulting you, I’m describing you”
- “Don’t worry about hurting my feelings because I can guarantee there’s no link between my self-esteem and your acceptance of me.”
- “Not everybody has to love me. I can’t force you to have good taste”
- “She likes him, He likes her. Everyone knows, except them.”
- “Hating people consumes far too much energy. So I’ll just pretend you don’t exist.”
- “I actually really nice, until you annoy me.”
- “I love sarcasm, it’s like punching people in the face, but with words”
- “A relationship is a test for which you’ve never studied.”
- “I love you more than I originally planned to.”
- “Go for someone who is proud to have you. Not because you’re pretty, but because they value you as a person.”
- “You can’t be wise and in love”
- “Where there’s love there are lies.”
- “Happily ever after is so once upon a time.”
- “Of all the lies I’ve heard, “I love you” is the best.”
- “You don’t stop loving someone. Either you always will or you never did in the first place.”
Sarcastic Relationship Jokes
- “I love like a fat kid loves cake”
- “Girls express their feelings via tears, Boys express their feelings via Beer”
- “Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it’s probably shit.”
- “The brain is the most outstanding organ it works 24 hours a day, 365 days a year from birth until fall in love.”
- “You’re just like bacon you make everything better”
- “Facebook should have a limit on how many times you can change your relationship status. After 3 it should default to unstable”
- “Hi I’m Mr Right, Someone told me you were looking for me”
- “My husband thinks I’m crazy, however, he’s the one who married me”
- “Cute guys make you crazy, Hot guys make you drool, Cool guys make you a daydreamer but funny guys make you fall in love.”
- “Flow your brain, your heart is an idiot.”
- “Besides chocolate, you’re my favourite”
- “I love you more than I love beer and I really love beer”
- “Don’t break someone’s heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206 of them”
- “You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That is your common sense leaving your body”
- “I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake.”
Sarcastic Quotes About Love
- “I solemnly swear I am up to no good. Especially when I am all alone with you!”
- “I love you with all my belly. I would say heart, but my belly is bigger.”
- “In a room full of art, I’d still stare at you.”
- “Good thing I brought my library card because I’m totally checking you out.”
- “I think you are suffering from a lack of vitamin me.”
- “Every day I fall in love with you more and more. Except for yesterday… yesterday you were pretty annoying.”
- “Together with you is my favourite place to be.”
- “Most women desire someone who makes them laugh and also feel safe. So basically a clown ninja.”
- “It’s amazing how one day someone walks into your life, and then the next day you wonder how you lived without them.”
- “You add meaning to my life and yet, you subtract some cash from my wallet”
- “He stole my heart so I’m planning revenge. I am going to take his last name.”
- “Sometimes I look at my boyfriend and think. Damn, he is one lucky man.”
- “I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain and bought jewellery.”
- “Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age – as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.”
- “Ladies, if a man says he will fix it, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it.”
- “By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.”
- “Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell.”
- “Relationships are like a walk in the park. Jurassic Park.”
Sarcastic Quotes On Relationship for Whatsapp
- “I love you enough to make our iPhone-Samsung relationship work.”
- “If your significant other is mad at you put a cape on them and say “Now you’re super mad!”
- “The four most important words in any marriage. I’ll do the dishes”
- “Getting into a relationship may seem tempting, but so was getting on the Titanic and look what happened there.”
- “All I know is one of us is right and the other one is you.”
- “The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.”
- “Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.”
- “Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.”
- “People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.”
- “A relationship is when one person is always right and the other person is the boyfriend.”
- You make me dance like a fool, forget how to breathe, shine like gold, buzz like a bee. Just the thought of you can drive me wild oh, you make me smile.”
- When you open a snack and your wife suddenly starts paying attention.”
- “I asked my grandpa, after 65 years you still call grandma darling, beautiful and honey. What’s the secret? He said that I forget her name 5 years ago and I am scared to ask her.”
- “I tried to be a nice person but sometimes my mouth doesn’t corporate.”
- “My Wife and I have been married for forty-seven years and not once we had had an argument series enough to consider divorce; Murder yes, but divorce never.”
- “f you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you.”
- I am not an early bird or a night owl. I am some form of a permanently exhausted pigeon.”
- “I hate the way I don’t hate you. Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.”
More Sarcastic Quotes On Relationship
- “Hey, I found your nose. It was in my business again.”
- “Sometimes the honest, answers are the ones that can get in you trouble.”
- “I did not realize that you are an expert on my life and I should live it. Sorry! please continue as I take notes.”
- “Sometimes I used big words that I don’t understand in order to sound intelligent and hypovitaminosis.”
- I don’t care what people think of me. Mosquitoes find me super attractive.”
- “The home is the training centre for endurance.”
- “Philosophy should begin with the feeling of wonder, no doubt.”
- “Tell me not to do something and I will do it twice and take pictures.”
- “You know stupidity is not considered a crime. So you are free to go.”
- “Love me without fear, trust me without questioning. Need me without demanding, Want me without restrictions. Accept me without change. Love me for who I am.”
- “I wish everything was as easy as getting fat.”
- “They say the grass is greener on the other side. Am assuring you the water bills are higher too.”
- “It’s hard to sleep when your heart is at war with your mind.”
- ‘Sometimes it’s better to just let things be, let people go, don’t fight for closure, don’t ask for explanations. Don’t chase answers and don’t expect people to understand where you’re coming from.”
Our Sarcastic Quotes on Relationship might have bought some happiness to our reader’s life. Do share with you loved ones even and let us on the comment box which quote you love the most.
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